I have been diagnosed as schizo-effective and possibly bipolar. I have severe manic depression.
But I keep remembering what I heard from one of my Moslem friends... that an Imam or scholar once said that 99% of mental illnesses are Jinn.
I don't hear voices but I have bad, bad thoughts all day long. I can't help them. Some are humorous thoughts, some about suicide, some are angry... either way, they're bad. I have bad thoughts about the Qur'an and the Prophet (SAW). But I don't mean think them. I don't really believe them.
Sometimes I think way too much. Things pop into my head (thoughts from Shaitan)... like bad things the media, Christians, and Jews say about Muslim. I contemplate if they are true or not. Sometimes it gets so bad that for brief moments I think that Islam may not be true.
I feel so bad because for a reason that I do not know, this happens most severely when I am at the Jum'ah sermon and listening to the Imam speak.
I don't know what to do. I am tormented. And now I keep thinking that I am not Moslem anymore since I keep doubting Islam. Yet at other times my faith is so strong.



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