Doubts, questions and my own problems.

[Endangered Specie]

Assalamualikum.

I couldnt find any thread where I can introduce myself so I have instead posted a new thread.

I am just another teen who is confused, doesnt know what to do and finds himself far away from Islam.

Over here I look forward to a few doubts of mine being cleared, a few questions of mine being answered and a whole lot of support from the members of this forum.

I will be posting my questions/problems soon, Inshallah.

Take care.

[bugmenot]

wa rahmatullah,

welcome brother, every one learn from each other here. May Allah jalla wa 'ala guide us all

[Endangered Specie]

Thanks brother bugmenot.

I dont really know where to begin. I have grown up in a Gulf country (I dont want to disclose the name of the country right now) and still reside in the same country. In school I have mixed with people of various religions. I, like the other male friends of mine, also had many female friends and still do.

Movies, especially Bollywood ones, have always been enjoyed by me. As a child and also as a growing individual I have watched almost every movie released. Not that I am proud of it now. These movies might have affected because I soon started to daydream of being the actor and sweeping the actress off the floor.

Between the age of 12-18 I have been in three relationships with girls. The last one lasted for over 3 years and though I have broken up with her for over a year now, I havent really moved on. Life seemed to come to a fullstop for me. And its an ugly fullstop.

It is here that I wanted to beclose to Allah. I have never regularly prayed. I have always been either too much into Islam - praying 5 times a day and reciting Quran and trying to follow as much of Sunnahs as I can - or not praying at all, watching movies. It has been two ends of the spectrum.

I dont want to sound egoistic/showoff but I have been very successful in my school. Studies / Sports / Extra curricular activites - you name it and I have done it and done it very well. Teachers loved me, class mates envied me, girls adored me. Success went into my head and I took my success for granted. These past two years I have faced only failure after failures.
Grades have been down and popularity has dipped too. I dont even know what the problem is, all I know is I might not want the fake popularity back, I might not want the girls back, but I want Islam back in my life.

How and what all should I do to change?

[Abd'Al-Muqtadir]

Akhi.

I do not blame you at all as to what has happened to you, you simply got trapped in Satans trap for the youth, and Alhamdulillah you survived to try and become a better Muslim. I can tell you my life was kind of similar to yours, all us teen these days feel like we can do so much and be the best, but when life comes crashing down, then you feel hopless, and Islam is the only remedy. Now then, what can you do now?
Initally, remember Akhi, the only reason why you really failed is because it is Allah's will, and it always happens for good. Remember the fame of this world is nothing, it is just a trial. As for your 'girls', repent to Allah, as to that is a major sin, and also that you didn't pray 5 times a day or nothing. I hope that I am not being harsh, but Akhi, you must go back and pray before it is too late. Go back to your moque, and ask the imams there for help, don't be shy, Im sure the sheikhs would be more than happy to help a bright lad like you Ask your family for help as well, read books about Islam, and gain the fear of Allah inside you. Don't miss one Rakah of prayer, as this would greatly place your Iman down. Also, get rid of these movies, I know it is hard, but Ask Allah to make it easy for you. Listen to lectures as well. We need you to build your Taqwa of Allah inside your heart, so you can understand the importance of Al- Islam. Remember now that you have rememberd Islam, never turn your back, keep on telling us if you have any problems or you want advice, Insha'Allah we shall be there to help you

And you are most welcome to join us

[Endangered Specie]

Assalamualikum.

Thank you brother Abd'Al-Muqtadir and sister Zainab_Zainab for the wonderful replies. I have read these two posts first thing in the morning so I do hope and believe it will make my day.

Brother, the imams in my mosque speak only Arabic. I cannot speak the Arabic language fluently. Its just not up to the mark. So I dont know what to do about it.

I have got a few friends in my circle of friends who think along the same lines like me but all we do is realize that what we are/were doing is wrong but dont go on to change the wrong into right. This is what hopefully I will do.

Now for one of my questions. If I want to make up for the missed prayers what should I be doing? Should I pray after every farz prayer a missed prayer? But then how is it done for Asr/Fajr?

Take care.

[Goldfish]

Don't quote me on this but I THINK for Asr you can pray your missed prayer before Asr and then pray Asr after..

Someone please clarify....

Keep strong and concentrate on positives, even the most seemingly successful people have unhappiness in their lives. I teach for a living and I come across disheartened kids almost everyday, but then insha allah everyone finds their way. It'll work out insha allah. I tend to say to myself when I'm feeling down "Allah is with me, Allah is near me and Allah is looking at me" - what better help than the creator of the universe!! Have faith.

[Abu Shuja'ah]

I'm not one to judge, I have been in the same predicament for sometime but in a different way. I wasn't popular or religious. It's when I became religious I became popular. Weird, I know, what makes it weirder is that I attend a Roman Catholic school! Yeah, the Muslim is the one everyone looks to for guidance. It's fun giving dawah there, a lot of youths seem to be searching for the straight path in this time of greed, jealousy and homosexuality.

Change is something we all have to deal with in life. Personally I applaud you for realising that maybe everything was a little off in your life. As humans we only see the error of our ways when we have been through the consequences of them. You have faith brother, which is good. Allhumduillah.

To be a better Muslim, it doesn't take much, only your time and dead on intention. You must believe that everything occurs because of Allah[swt]. Have faith in Him. To me you seem to still want just a little bit of that 'fame' you had. It's addicting is what it is. But do you return all that attention you get by giving Allah[swt] the attention only He deserves?

Start by praying Fajr. When you return from school pray Asr and if you can try Maghrib. Do this for one week. The other week try praying 4/5 prayers and on the third week go for all 5.

OR

Just start going to the Masjid. This is surely better as you would be in the House of Allah[swt]. Try for at least two nights a week. Perform Salaat, read tasbeeh, recite Quran and enjoy the quiet in the Masjid. Surely this is better than just trying to pray little by little. Go with a religious Muslim friend and everything will work out, Insha Allah.

This is going to be a change that you must commit yourself to doing. This is if you want to be a better person both inside and out. Don't just jump into Islam as you tried. Doing so will only confuse you. Take it a a time. Remember there is no compulsion in religion. So make the intention, start of with the Salaat and change you friends. Get religious ones. It works. Insha Allah all will be well.

Good job and keep trying to increase your Iman.

I ask the brothers and sisters to make dua for this young brother, who is no different than any of us. He is a brother in need and we will heed your call for help. Ameen.

Allahu Alam.

[Umme Maryam]

Assalamualikum.

Thank you brother Abd'Al-Muqtadir and sister Zainab_Zainab for the wonderful replies. I have read these two posts first thing in the morning so I do hope and believe it will make my day.

Brother, the imams in my mosque speak only Arabic. I cannot speak the Arabic language fluently. Its just not up to the mark. So I dont know what to do about it.

I have got a few friends in my circle of friends who think along the same lines like me but all we do is realize that what we are/were doing is wrong but dont go on to change the wrong into right. This is what hopefully I will do.

Now for one of my questions. If I want to make up for the missed prayers what should I be doing? Should I pray after every farz prayer a missed prayer? But then how is it done for Asr/Fajr?

Take care.

Assalam alaikum brother--
The masjid I go to has an imam who speaks English fluently and delivers fantastic sermons for the asian population. I know there are a few such Masjids in Dubai and Abu Dhabi, UAE-- i am sure you can find such masjids in your city too, InshAllah!

[Zainab_Zainab]

Assalamualaikum brother
You know, I think i can relate to you, I was the same, a very popular person, I seemed to have everything yet inside i felt lonely, isolated...incomplete...
My happiness was an illusion, I kept telling myself I was happy but this was far from the case..
However, alhumdulillah, I was guided towards the right path and wallah I have never felt more at peace since I started to practise Islam and leave the old life behind..

Firstly, I think it is wonderful that you have decided to change, May Allah (swt) make the path easy for you. ameen..

In my opinion, you should firstly sincerely repent for any gunnahs that you may have commited and vow never to repeat these mistakes.

Secondly, I think you should make a list of all the ' good' and ' bad' things that you are doing at the moment. If you can see that your list is full of bad whilst your good list seems virtually empty, maybe this will be that incentive for you to change, maybe it will motivate you to make your ' good' list longer....

Start praying your salaah with the right intention, make time after every prayer to make dua, even if it is only a short one.

Try and recite some Qur'aan daily if you can, also engage in dhikr as often as you can...

Try and cut down contact with people/girls who will only hold you back. Instead, find brothers who will help you in your quest to change your ways. Speaking to others can indeed be very inspirational.

I know its not easy to change everything straight away, you know what they say, ' Rome wasn't built in a day'... But Insha'Allah, if you have the right intention and really do want to change your ways, then you will find that leaving the things you once valued so dearly will not be that much of a problem.

I hope that you find this post useful, Insha'Allah and i do pray that the path is made easy for you, and for us all, Insha'Allah.

Wassalam

[Hamza81]

Thanks brother bugmenot.

I dont really know where to begin. I have grown up in a Gulf country (I dont want to disclose the name of the country right now) and still reside in the same country. In school I have mixed with people of various religions. I, like the other male friends of mine, also had many female friends and still do.

Movies, especially Bollywood ones, have always been enjoyed by me. As a child and also as a growing individual I have watched almost every movie released. Not that I am proud of it now. These movies might have affected because I soon started to daydream of being the actor and sweeping the actress off the floor.

Between the age of 12-18 I have been in three relationships with girls. The last one lasted for over 3 years and though I have broken up with her for over a year now, I havent really moved on. Life seemed to come to a fullstop for me. And its an ugly fullstop.

It is here that I wanted to beclose to Allah. I have never regularly prayed. I have always been either too much into Islam - praying 5 times a day and reciting Quran and trying to follow as much of Sunnahs as I can - or not praying at all, watching movies. It has been two ends of the spectrum.

I dont want to sound egoistic/showoff but I have been very successful in my school. Studies / Sports / Extra curricular activites - you name it and I have done it and done it very well. Teachers loved me, class mates envied me, girls adored me. Success went into my head and I took my success for granted. These past two years I have faced only failure after failures.
Grades have been down and popularity has dipped too. I dont even know what the problem is, all I know is I might not want the fake popularity back, I might not want the girls back, but I want Islam back in my life.

How and what all should I do to change?

Asalaam wr wb brother i hope your well inshallah! My brother your here today searching and wanting peace and happiness back in your soul because going towards Islam is the ONLY way to gain true happiness in this life! NOTHING else in this world will EVER give us true happiness and contentment but with Allah! Allah confirms this himself in the Qur'an!
We have ONLY been created to worship Allah my brother and in the Qur'an the almighty tells us how to gain success in this world and the next! We will ONLY gain success in this world and the next by being FULLY obedient to Allah and his commandments and ONLY then will we be truly happy and content in this life! If we do this then Allah will also give us a fulfilling life in this world brother that is a guarantee!
My brother we should NEVER swap the next world in place of this world! This world is just so temporary and NOTHING compared to the REAL pleasures of Jannah! We can work our WHOLE lives 24/7 and build a wonderful life for ourselves here and then the next day we die before we can even enjoy the fruits of our hard labour!What was the point of all that investment just in this world when it can end at ANYTIME!
Lets not invest too much into this world lets invest as much as we can to the next world which is our final and ultimate destination! The prophet(saw) says to that we should treat this life as if it were just on a journey! This life is not a very long stop until our final abode which is the hereafter!
When investors are looking to invest in a business venture do they look for short term gains or long term? Obviously long term brother and thats what we should be looking for because the cleverist person is the one who makes arrangements for the hereafter and not only in this world! Thats not to say that we should'nt have our share in this world of course we should but we should invest most of our time in the next life which is for ETERNITY! If we don't then we will regret it forever because on the day of judgement when were standing infornt of Allah we will ask him to give us another chance and put us back on earth so that we may do things better and never transgress but Allah will say i gave u MANY chances and you did not come towards me now you can go towards Hell! We would NOT be able to handle a single second in the hell fire brother we cannot even imagine how terrifying this will be so we should do our best in this life to seek protection from it and make our good deeds balance as heavy as possible!
Brother we get SO many chances everyday! Allah waits for his servants to change and he gives us SO many chances but at ANY moment our chances could run out and we would be certainly doomed! We don't want this my brother we have the chance to change now!
Allah has blessed u so much by wanting to guide you because you coming into this forum and wanting to change for the better is Allah wanting to give you guidance and bring you closer to him! How will he give you guidance if you don't grab it? So grab the guidance brother with both hands! If you walk towards Allah he will RUN towards you! Don't you feel happy that Allah wants to guide you? But it is all upto you now to grab the guidance and grab this opportunity! Its now or never! If u fail now and don't change then Allah will remind you of this day and say to you do you not remember how many chances i gave you on this time or that time etc! Then you will have NOTHING to say!
Brother once you come towards deen you will feel better than you have EVER felt! These girlfriends are a distraction from shaythan who wants your doom! You will NEVER be happy with having girlfriends just more pain,anguish and anger from Allah! Relationships never work all they cause is pain brother and enevitabley when relationships don't work out then scarring can be left on the 2 people for a long time which wastes SO much time! Shaythan wants us to come closer to him so he can distract us away from the deen and away from Allah!Lets not let him win!
Once you come towards deen and when your ready for marrige then do things the halal way and inshallah Allah will give u a perfect pious partner who will truly love you and you can both practice the deen together and have a fulfilling happy and contented life and both together can worship Al;lah and practice Islam together!
None of these celebrities,rich people or playas are truly happy! Shaythan may sometimes decieve us into thinking they are but i promise you brother they are DEFINATLEY NOT! They will NEVER be satisfied with what they have but a true muslim may have SO little in this world but he could be the happiest and most contented person on this earth!
Allah gives true happiness to his servants but Allah does test us! He tests us in MANY ways to see if we will be patient and how will we react! Once we passed brothr then Allah tells his angels of our glad tidinds of paradise because Allah says in the Qur'an that he is with the one who is patient!
Lets go towards Islam brother and grab this most AMAZING chance by Allah to get guidance from him! Lets not wastse these precious seconds brother because time is SO precious that we cannot imagine how much! Once our time is up then we can never get it back and death can NEVER be pushed back or forwarded it will come in its appointed time!
So brother this is your chance to aim HIGH and gain the HIGH positions in paradise! Allah wants you to come closer to hi so grab this opportunity and lets go away from shaythan who wants our destruction by distracting us with worthless time wasting that will NEVER benefit us but cause our doom!Brother come towards Allah and You will NEVER regret it and thank you will thank him for it for the rest of your life and live a life of TRUE happiness instead of fake happiness with shaythan!
I thought i would paste the weblink for you of two articles which i feel you feel find very benificial inshallah! Please brother if you have ANY qustions or problems or quesries or need help with anything then please don't heistate to ask! Make dua for me brother! Allah hafiz