Husbands desires another wife

[Shaikhette]

Assalamu al alaikum wa rehamtulahi wa baraktun

My husband has recently voiced a desire to have another wife. I am completely against this and this has caused concern in our families. What can I say to him that will make him see that marrying more than one wife is not just in todays world since he's already hurt me.
Make dua for me

Jazakamullahu khairun

[amal]

Assalamu al alaikum wa rehamtulahi wa baraktun

My husband has recently voiced a desire to have another wife. I am completely against this and this has caused concern in our families. What can I say to him that will make him see that marrying more than one wife is not just in todays world since he's already hurt me.
Make dua for me

Jazakamullahu khairun

You need to find fast why he needs another wife and try to fill the gap. In this way he will not wish to have another one, how its says better with old which is known, when a new one and un known...Thats a saying which cross my mind now.

Don't try because will not work( are useless):
-crying
-menaces
-insults.

[Shaikhette]

alhumdulillah he is quite content with me and assures me it has nothing to do with me. he wants to follow sunnah he says. that is his reason.

[amal]

alhumdulillah he is quite content with me and assures me it has nothing to do with me. he wants to follow sunnah he says. that is his reason.

If only this is the reason, you need to calm down and try to show him ,he can't follow sunnah because has not enough money to deal equally with both wives. Please try to enlarge quickly your shopping list...

[Omar HH]

Women who obey their husbands will get many good deeds in the next world.

Trust that Allah (SWT) has willed the best for you and be patient.

Ask him to pray Salatul Istikhara beforehand.

[amal]

I say only if you deep inside don't like the idea to have another woman near to you, try to stop that. Try to save your marriage at this point, because without to know, its a little step until you will begin to hate him, like other womens. If its still respect between you too, try to save it.
I don't know if you will get the deeds, if you spent your entire life ignoring your husband and living in unhapiness.


I heard on tv, i think, it was a talk show how great if the man has more wives: in this way you will be not forced to see him the whole day... something like that. But this is very far from the marriage life.

[Hmmm]

Also, the Qur’an conditioned the permissibility of marrying more than one wife with justice and fair treatment. It is a grave sin to treat the wives unequally. Any man who wishes to take a second wife also has to meet the important condition of fair treatment of all his wives. The verse quoted above includes the command to treat wives equally, and anyone who is unable to do so should marry only one wife.

Equal treatment includes all social, economical and physical needs. It is very difficult for human beings to be completely fair, a fact which is recognised by the Qur’an:

“You are never able to be fair and just as between women, even if it is your ardent desire: but turn not away (from a woman) altogether, so as to leave her (as it were) hanging (in the air)... (Surah al-Nisa, 129).

The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) said:

“A man who marries more than one woman and then does not deal justly with them will be resurrected with half his faculties paralysed” (Sahih al-Bukhari).

However, this refers to aspects that are within the capacity of a man such as equal treatment with regards to social, economical and physical needs. As far as the inclination of the heart is concerned, then that is beyond the capacity of a man.

{Mufti ibn Adam al-Kawthari}

It is a permissable but not necessarily recommended sunnah for the reasons outlined in the above piece.

I am certain there are many other aspects of the sunnah that are actively recommended that he can work on.

In addition, it should be noted that the sunnah with respect to polygamy is to marry and provide for older widows who cannot provide for themselves. Does he wish to do this?

[nayyerjigar]

isnt it illegal in the West to practice polygamy anyway?

I am pretty sure its illegal in USA as people like the Mormons in Utah do it secretly.

[VeiledOne]

isnt it illegal in the West to practice polygamy anyway?

I am pretty sure its illegal in USA as people like the Mormons in Utah do it secretly.

Yes, it is illegal. However, there are cases of people like the muslims doing it secretly also.

[Muhammad al-Ayyub]

Yes, it is illegal. However, there are cases of people like the muslims doing it secretly also.

studied in law...if muslims do that and get caught(even not under any marriage registration) their's is the trouble by the law(uk)



respect man made laws because they try to interpret the divine nature of humans life without any established law...that takes real human efforts