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Thread: ANSWERED: Rights of Parent in-laws over wife.

  1. #1
    Moderator ursis's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005

    Default Rights of Parent in-laws over wife.

    Is a wife obliged to serve her father and mother in-law?
    Do they have any rights over her?
    what is the Islamic ruling?

  2. #2
    Senior Member Nafeesa's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2004


    The parents in law have no rights over her what so ever. Ive come across so many husband n wife books that cant stress enough that the wife is not obliged to look after the parents in law. If she wants to then thats gud may Allah reward her for it but she shudnt be forced. Just another kwik point which so many cultural men arnt aware of, if the wife wants to live seperatly from her parents in law n she tells u or hints it to u, it is wajib on u to provide seperate facillities for her, if u cant afford a house then u wud need to provide her with her own room with lock n key, n ive read that it wud be advisable for u to even provide her with seperate cooking facillities because aparantly most quarals between mother n daughter in law start in the kitchen.

    Here is some information I found for u.

    Serving the In-laws is not obligatory

    There is another fact worthy of notice about which much negligence is observed among the people. When a wife is not responsible to cook food for her husband and his children, then she is more appropriately not responsible to cook food for the parents of the husband and his brothers and sisters. A custom has gained currency in our society that the parents of the son think that their right over the daughter-in-law has a priority over the right of the son. Therefore she is bound to serve them, no matter if she serves her husband or not. Such a misleading conception gives rise to quarrels and disputes among the daughter-in-law and other members of the family. The negative results of this conception are obvious to require any comments.

    To serve In-Laws is a virtue for a woman

    Bear in mind well that it is the responsibility of the son to serve his parents. It is, however, a matter of blessing and virtue for the daughter-in-law if she serves the parents of her husband willingly, as a righteous deed and source of reward for her in the Hereafter. The son does not have any right to force his wife to serve his parents in case she does not feel inclined to serve them of her own sweet will. It is also not lawful for the parents to force their daughter-in-law to serve them. As already mentioned, if the daughter-in-law voluntarily decides to serve her in-laws for the sake of recompense in the Hereafter she is welcome to do so. This will create happy and pleasant atmosphere in the household.

    Appreciate the services of a daughter-in-law

    If a daughter-in-law is serving his father and mother-in-law, she is doing favour out of her moral character because she is giving this service to them only of her free will and she is not in any way liable for such services. Her in-laws should, therefore, appreciate this voluntary service from her. They should try to requite her for this and encourage her. Ignorance of these rights and liabilities create various problems in social life which play havoc to the solidarity and welfare of families through quarrels and disputes. All these troubles are taking place simply because the people have banished from their minds the limits of these mutual rights and liabilities which the Holy Prophet [sallallaahu alyhi wasallam] has fixed in his Traditions.

    The Husband should serve his parents himself
    A question arises as to who should serve the parents when they are old, weak or otherwise helpless on account of sickness when there is none in the house except their son and his wife? Even in such a situation, the daughter-in-law is not bound, according to the Shari'ah to serve her in-laws. It is, however, a matter of blessings and virtue for her if she serves them of her own free will with the belief to please Allah and to receive reward in the Hereafter. The son should, however, realise that it is his responsibility to help and serve his parents personally or by employing a servant for this purpose. If the wife is looking after his old parents, the husband must appreciate this service and be thankful to her.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2004


    Please see .

    Allah knows best.


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