
Originally Posted by
yishmael
please can someone help me, i have a serious problem i need the help a.s.a.p
just 3 days before ramadan i ate raw corriander and someone told me id loose my fertility
so to see if i had my fertility i did the act "masturbation" and checked my fluids
luckily i am still fertile but the problem is that
now i am addicted to it i was addicted to it in the past but i managed to stop somehow
on the night before ramadan my addiction strengthened i know it was probably my naffs + satan performing a full scale attack, ok so i need help as to how i should stop it
im really worried i can bearly control myself its the most horrible feeling i've ever had in my life
SOME ONE PLEASE HELP ME!!!
i have no one else to ask PLEASE!!
Asalaamu Alaikum,
Firstly we must realise that Masturbation is a Major Sin. Therefore we must do everything in our power to stop this evil habit. We must feel shame in front of Allah who is watching us at all times.
According to Arif Billah Hazrat Maulana Shah Hakeem Mohammad Akhtar Sahab db:
1. The Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) is reported to have said, “The one who marries their hand is accursed.” That person who masturbates them self has been cursed by Allah and His Messenger (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) and on the Day of Judgment their hand will be pregnant.
2. It is a means of destroying ones’ life in this world and the Hereafter.
3. It diminishes ones’ health.
4. It is a major sin and if repentance is not made from a major sin, then the person will fall under the threat of being thrown into Hell.
5. This person is potentially not capable of marriage because their semen will become thin.
6. A person may develop many diseases, such as gonorrhea and chancrous, etc.
7. Due to this evil habit, eventually the person becomes involved in fornication or adultery.
8. This evil habit comes upon a person due to the curse of lustful glances. Since it is mentioned in the Qur’an that the person who guards their gaze will be able to guard their private parts, from this we can gauge that the person who casts lustful glances will not be able to guard their private parts. As a result, they lose control of them self.
9. The person becomes weak sexually and mentally meaning that they have memory loss, blood deficiency, their resolutions become weak, their heart becomes weak to such an extent that if a cat were to jump from one place to another this person’s heart would skip a beat or start beating faster as if a lion had just jumped in front of him.
10. The radiance and splendor from one’s face is depleted, dark circles start to form around the eyes and a strange curse befalls this person because this person is involved in a cursed action; they become pale, their eyes go inward, they start to have mood swings. As a result, their body, heart and mind go down a slippery slope towards destruction.
11. If a person does not quit early, then in their youth they develop of a disease of incontinence of bladder.
12. Due to undue hard stroking, the nerves, arteries and veins all tend to die out and blood doesn’t flow properly to that organ, due to which it may become limp and the person no longer has the ability to perform intercourse. They may develop impotence or erectile dysfunction, and thus they will face a great shame in front of their wife, society and the matter could even reach divorce.
13. Repeatedly ejaculating causing ones’ semen to become extremely thin, due to which one loses virility
14. Sometimes the mere rubbing against ones’ clothes or the mere thought of intercourse with ones’ wife may cause ejaculation. One’s organ may become crooked. It may grow in girth from the front and then towards the back due to which a person may not be fully capable of intercourse.
15. A persons’ memory becomes weak, they often experience headaches, due to minor strenuous activity; they may experience temporary blindness, cold sweats and anxiety.
16. Sometimes semen becomes uncontrollable causing ones’ mind to become weak, one to be disinclined and not interested in studying and whatever one learns, they are not able to retain it.
The following are 12 tips for you to take control of this evil habit once and for all but you MUST be consistant:
1. Never touch the intimate parts of your body except during normal toilet processes. Even if you get tempted, just think of Allah and the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) and that Allah is wathcing you at all times and this urge will go away.
2. Avoid being alone as much as possible. Shaythan plays with the minds of those who sit around idle and not doing anything. Find good company and stay in this good company. Spend time with your family and close ones(Not Non mahrams) Find good company and stay in this good company.The best company are those who lead you towards good and not those who lead you in the wrong direction. Don't hang around with those girls who talk about sexual things and boys etc.
3. If you are associated with other persons having this same problem, you must break off their friendship. Never associate with other people having the same weakness. Don't suppose that two of you will quit together, you never will. You must get away from people of that kind. Just to be in their presence will keep your problem foremost in your mind. The problem must be taken out of your mind for that is where it really exists. Your mind must be on other and more wholesome things.
4. When you bathe, do not admire yourself in a mirror. Never stay in the bath more than five or six minutes -- just long enough to bathe and dry and dress and then get out of the bathroom as soon as possible because we are advised in the sunnah not to delay getting changed after a bath. We should dry ourselves and get into doing an act of worship.
5. When in bed, if that is where you have your problem for the most part, dress yourself for the night so securely that you cannot easily touch your vital parts, and so that it would be difficult and time consuming for you to remove those clothes. By the time you started to remove protective clothing you would have sufficiently controlled your thinking that the temptation would leave you. Sleep on your sides and NOT on your front or back. It is forbidden to sleep on your stomach and it is sunnah to sleep on your right side. Do dua's and Zikr until you fall asleep.
6. If the temptation seems overpowering while you are in bed, get out of bed and go into the kitchen and fix yourself a snack, even if it is in the middle of the night, and even if you are not hungry, and despite your fears of gaining weight. The purpose behind this suggestion is that you get your mind on something else. You are the subject of your thoughts, so to speak. If these thoughts come to you in the middle of the night then go and do wudu and pray Tahajjud and make much dua and cry in your dua's of Allah to increase you in imaan (Faith) and to help you resist your desires and to help you get married ASAP.
7. Find out when are your weakest times when your most likely to masterbate or touch yourself. When you have established on what times and occassions this occurs then you can plan what to do to avoid feeling temptations on thos particular occassions.
8. Never read pornographic material especially on the internet as these images will be stored in your head and it will make your problem worse. Try to keep your gaze low at all times. Never read about your problem. Keep it out of mind. Remember -- "First a thought, then an act." The thought pattern must be changed. You must not allow this problem to remain in your mind. When you accomplish that, you soon will be free of the act inshallah.
9. Put wholesome thoughts into your mind at all times. Read good Islamic books, the life of the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) and his seerah, the life after death. There SO many interesting topics to read and learn about. Make a daily habit of reading at least one juz(Chapter) of Qur'an with its meanings.
Reading the Qur'an everyday with its meanings will bring countless blessings and rewards and bring you closer to Allah as well as keep you busy and occupied therefore keeping your mind off this problem.
10. Make much dua. But when you make dua don't just make dua about this problem, for that will tend to keep it in your mind more than ever. Make dua for increase of your iman(faith), Make dua for understanding of the Islam and the Qur'an, Make dua for your family and ALL Muslims especially the ones that are being oprressed, Pray for the sick and that we all unite as one. keep the problem out of your mind by not mentioning it ever --not in conversation with others, not inso much in your dua's. keep it out of your mind because if you keep mentioning it then it will stay in your mind!
11. Fast. You may have tried it before and it did'nt work but how can it work if we don't change our eating habits? If we eat little just to satisfy our stomachs then our fasting will be effective and restrict our sexual urges and capability's. But if we carry on over eating after our fasts then that food will impact on the stomach which will impact on our desires. So restrict the amount you eat before and after fasting and you will feel the benefits of fasting to stop your urges.
12. Finally the best solution of all- GET MARRIED. Give some urgency to your family about the need for you to get married sooner rather than later. Tell them of the benefits of getting married early and that it is a sunnah as the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) recommended it as it will help avoid haraam(Forbidden) relations with non mahrams and getting married early will help eradicate this problem and mean that one can indulge in their sexual urges and desires legitamatley as well as recieve reward for it. The main reason why there is so many haraam relations out there is for the fact that our families are not getting their children married early enough as the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) advised.
Here are more tips:
Remedy for Masturbation
by Arif Billah Hazrat Maulana Shah Hakeem Mohammad Akhtar Sahab db
1. The primary cure for ridding ones’ self of any evil is himmah, i.e. ones’ one determination. Without ones’ firm determination, there is no cure. Whenever ones’ nafs tries to involve a person in this particular sin then fight it off as if a person were to fight off an enemy that is after their life. Similarly, one should be as determined to save ones’ iman as they would be to save ones’ own life. They should be so determined that they must be willing to give up their life, but not commit sin. The day a person has this type of determination then this evil habit will leave. Also, one should try as much as possible not to be in seclusion.
2. One should ponder over this that the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) is reported to have said, the paraphrased meaning of which is, one who masturbates is accursed.
3. Ponder over the shame that one would feel on the Day of Judgment, when this person will be raised and their hand will be pregnant in front of Allah and His Messenger (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam).
4. Ponder over all the harms mentioned in the earlier section.
5. Realize that this debasing act only amounts to a short-lived pleasure.
6. Allah is with us all the time.
7. Meditate over the fact that Allah is watching us all the time.
8. This evil habit is due to the curse of lustful glances. Therefore, one should not view any pornographic material and not even go close to pictures in the newspaper, on the internet, cable, television, VCR; DVD etc. to such an extent that one should even start avoiding emails, otherwise random thoughts will come into ones’ mind and will cause heat to develop in ones’ body leading the person to ultimately masturbate.
9. One should not be by them self rather they should be amongst pious friends.
10. One should be concerned to stay in the company of the righteous with the condition that they inform the righteous person of their condition and implement the instructions of the righteous person.
11. To consult ones’ spiritual guide and stipulate a financial penalty such that one feels pain in their heart. This penalty should be in the form of charity. It shows the expertise of the spiritual guide. One should also feel remorse as to how sad their spiritual guide would be.
12. One should be willing to give up their life, but not commit sin. This state of being can only be developed by being in the company of righteous people, therefore adopt the company of the righteous.
13. Guard ones’ gaze and watch over ones’ heart because mere consultation with ones’ spiritual guide and litanies and the company of the righteous is not sufficient. Therefore, one should implement all the advices one receives from their spiritual guide regarding guarding ones’ gaze and watching over ones’ heart.
14. If perchance a person happens to fall prey to this accursed act then each time a minimum of twenty supererogatory prayers should be prayed or such a large amount of charity should be given such that it becomes burdensome on ones’ nafs
This is a brilliant E book on how to overcome Masterbation:
How and why stop Masterbation - An Islamic Solution
http://www.scribd.com/doc/17382181/H...lamic-Solution
Please read this brilliant article:
Was the Cowardly Lion Just Masturbating Too Much?
http://yourbrainonporn.com/was-the-c...ating-too-much
May Allah keep us away form anything that angers and displeases him. Ameen
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