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Thread: Why won't Muslims shake my hand?

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    Default Why won't Muslims shake my hand?

    I've had this quite a lot of times.


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    Moderator Sulaiman84's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why won't Muslims shake my hand?

    Peace,

    Do you mean, why don't non relative Muslim males shake your hand? It's because they follow the advice and practices of the Prophet Muhammad who did not shake hands with women who he could be married to.
    Hearts are predisposed to love someone who does them good and to detest someone who does them harm.

    - Shah Waliyyullah ad-Dihlawi's Arba'in


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    Default Re: Why won't Muslims shake my hand?

    Quote Originally Posted by Sulaiman84 View Post
    Peace,

    Do you mean, why don't non relative Muslim males shake your hand? It's because they follow the advice and practices of the Prophet Muhammad who did not shake hands with women who he could be married to.
    We did a big cultural awareness thing last year when we went to a Muslim area of an inner city and organised a lot of things. But at the end of it they refused to shake our hands. I found it extremely offensive, especially after we'd put all that time and effort in to try and help them.


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    Default Re: Why won't Muslims shake my hand?

    Bismillah Al-Rehman Al-Raheem

    Dear Sister Lorelei:

    When I was a child, whenever we were about to visit a home of another, I was told strictly by my parents to not touch anything that was mine. And I didn't, because I did not have the right.

    The reason Muslim men did not shake your hand (or of another woman) is because they honor and respect you as a woman and a person who has a right to her dignity, her individual and breathing space, and her self-respect. Also, their hands are not their own but a trust given to them by Allah for touching only those females who are given to them in trust by virtue of either a blood bond like a sister, mother, or child or in the sacred bond of marriage as a wife.

    How can they afford to consider the offenses that will be imagined by you or others when the concern that occupies them is the pleasure of Allah? Why should they transgress the bounds of Allah to please any human being?

    I was told not to touch anything that was mine by only my parents who raised me, but they (Muslim men) are told not to touch any non-mehram by Allah, their Creator. Why should they be put to shame for obeying their Creator instead of the customs of any culture which change according to times? (Did you not know that in U.K. once doing the same would be an offense, as evidenced by early history of the land?)

    Also, science has well proven that men are stimulated by sight but women by touch. How can they (these men) touch you when your husband should have the honor and the right to your person and being instead of any stranger?

    No, Sister, they were right not to shake your hand. And you should not hold a grudge in your heart or mind, for the offense was such a beautiful one by will of Allah and for the sake of Allah.

    If I have said anything that is good and true, it is from Allah, and anything other than that is my own mistake.


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    Default Re: Why won't Muslims shake my hand?

    Quote Originally Posted by Anybody View Post
    Bismillah Al-Rehman Al-Raheem

    Dear Sister Lorelei:

    When I was a child, whenever we were about to visit a home of another, I was told strictly by my parents to not touch anything that was mine. And I didn't, because I did not have the right.

    The reason Muslim men did not shake your hand (or of another woman) is because they honor and respect you as a woman and a person who has a right to her dignity, her individual and breathing space, and her self-respect. Also, their hands are not their own but a trust given to them by Allah for touching only those females who are given to them in trust by virtue of either a blood bond like a sister, mother, or child or in the sacred bond of marriage as a wife.

    How can they afford to consider the offenses that will be imagined by you or others when the concern that occupies them is the pleasure of Allah? Why should they transgress the bounds of Allah to please any human being?

    I was told not to touch anything that was mine by only my parents who raised me, but they (Muslim men) are told not to touch any non-mehram by Allah, their Creator. Why should they be put to shame for listening to their Creator instead of the customs of your culture which change according to times? (Did you not know that in U.K. once doing the same would be an offense in early history?)

    Also, science has well proven that men are stimulated by sight but women by touch. How can they (these men) touch you when your husband should have the honor and the right to your person and being instead of any stranger?

    No, Sister, they were right not to shake your hand. And you should not hold a grudge in your heart or mind, for the offense was such a beautiful one by will of Allah and for the sake of Allah.

    If I have said anything that is good and true, it is from Allah, and anything other than that is my own mistake.
    I find it insulting and degrading. If they want to live in our country, they should adapt to our customs. If not, they are free to leave.


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    Default Re: Why won't Muslims shake my hand?

    Bismillah Al-Rehman Al-Raheem

    Dear Sister Lorelei:

    Why should they leave that land? Who created that land? You? No, you do not have the power.

    Allah created that land.

    Why should they leave a land of which they hold citizenship, as permitted by the U.K. government?

    You know, Lorelei, whenever my high school lunch mates, invited me to use drugs, I simply told them no and just did not go. If you are offended, perhaps you should also not go to such events.

    Also, Sister, I find the act of a male who is not my relative touching me degrading and insulting. Perhaps you have your own view, and I have my own view. Then, Sister, how can we judge who is right? I say Allah.

    Moreover, if tomorrow, say the Muslim men started following your customs, and that satisfied you. But very soon, I am sure you would find a custom of another group ensuing from that particular group's beliefs offensive to you. In that case, you will still not be pleased, for you will find reasons for your feeling your offenses.

    Someone very wise once said, "You can't please everyone." And I agree. You can't. Therefore, excuse my ignorance, Sister, but I and other Muslims will Insha-Allah (God-willing) follow the will of Allah, our Creator, rather than any customs of human beings that does not agree with His will. Perhaps you have forgotten that even the Christian Lord's prayer holds the phrase, "thy will be done," and I cannot help but agree that His Will takes precedence over ours.

    I am sorry, however, to hear that you feel this way, but I cannot change how you feel. You have a right to your own feelings, and I and others have a right to our peace of mind Alhamdullilah (Praise to God) and our deen (way of life).

    If I have said anything that is good and true, it is from Allah, and anything other than that is my own mistake.


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    Default Re: Why won't Muslims shake my hand?

    Quote Originally Posted by Anybody View Post
    Bismillah Al-Rehman Al-Raheem

    Dear Sister Lorelei:

    Why should they leave that land? Who created that land? You? No, you do not have the power.

    Allah created that land.

    Why should they leave a land of which they hold citizenship, as permitted by the U.K. government?

    You know, Lorelei, whenever my high school lunch mates, invited me to use drugs, I simply told them no and just did not go. If you are offended, perhaps you should also not go to such events.

    Also, Sister, I find the act of a male who is not my relative touching me degrading and insulting. Perhaps you have your own view, and I have my own view. Then, Sister, how can we judge who is right? I say Allah.

    Moreover, if tomorrow, say the Muslim men started following your customs, and that satisfied you. But very soon, I am sure you would find a custom of another group ensuing from that particular group's beliefs offensive to you. In that case, you will still not be pleased, for you will find reasons for your feeling your offenses.

    Someone very wise once said, "You can't please everyone." And I agree. You can't. Therefore, excuse my ignorance, Sister, but I and other Muslims will Insha-Allah (God-willing) follow the will of Allah, our Creator, rather than any customs of human beings that does not agree with His will. Perhaps you have forgotten that even the Christian Lord's prayer holds the phrase, "thy will be done," and I cannot help but agree that His Will takes precedence over ours.

    I am sorry, however, to hear that you feel this way, but I cannot change how you feel. You have a right to your own feelings, and I and others have a right to our peace of mind Alhamdullilah (Praise to God) and our deen (way of life).

    If I have said anything that is good and true, it is from Allah, and anything other than that is my own mistake.
    Christians are banned from Saudi Arabia, I believe. So what's the difference? I don't believe Allah created the land either, since I don't believe in him.


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    Senior Member ahamed_sharif's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why won't Muslims shake my hand?

    I find it insulting and degrading. If they want to live in our country, they should adapt to our customs. If not, they are free to leave.
    Tomorrow you may ask to do other things!!!!!!!!!!!!!. Should we follow THE customs.

    اکلتہ الحشیش انتم لھِٰھنا
    وامتہ محمد صل.... فی الفتن

    You live a isolated life.
    And the Ummah of Rasulullah SAS is living in fitan.

    quoted by Moulana Manzoor Nomani RA.


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    Default Re: Why won't Muslims shake my hand?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lorelei View Post
    Christians are banned from Saudi Arabia, I believe. So what's the difference? I don't believe Allah created the land either, since I don't believe in him.
    The fact that you have these gross misconceptions which are completely unjustified makes it difficult to have a dialogue or debate with you.

    No religion is banned from Saudi Arabia. So I don't know how I can disprove something false.

    Do you believe that a God created the land? If so then we believe in that God.

    How do you define who is native of your country? Do you have to be white? Do you need to have certain values and certain behaviour without which you cannot be a citizen of that country? Please define who can and cannot be a part of your country.

    I find it offensive that people will judge me and discriminate against me because I am choosing to practice on my personal preference. Its not anyone's business why I am doing this. I don't hate the person or anything but I wouldn't shake hands with a Muslim woman either and a Muslim woman would refuse to shake hands with man as well. I mean where does it stop. Are we expected to kiss goodbyes as well?


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    Default Re: Why won't Muslims shake my hand?

    Quote Originally Posted by ahamed_sharif View Post
    I find it insulting and degrading. If they want to live in our country, they should adapt to our customs. If not, they are free to leave.

    Tomorrow you may ask to do other things!!!!!!!!!!!!!. Follow your customs.
    It's a question of manners, and etiquette. If someone refuses to shake my hand because I'm a woman, then I owe him no respect or consideration at all.


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