In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful
The Recipe of a Successful Marriage!
How to find a good spouse?
1. Tell me about yourself?
2. Please introduce yourself to me?
3. What are you looking for in life?
4. What is your goal?
5. What are you hoping for?
6. What do you want to achieve?
7. What kind of woman/man are you looking for?
8. What is your goal in a marriage?
9. What quality of woman/man do you prefer?
10. If you are looking for this quality in a woman/man, what quality do you think you possess?
11. What is the major quality which can make you attracted to your spouse and help you pursue your marriage?
12. What is his/her role in your life?
13. Do you want to be the teacher of your wife or would you prefer it vice-versa?
If the answer is, both of us will teach each other then shaitaan is your teacher!
If the answer is we will grow together and teach each other then the question will be, do you have a teacher (role model) in your life by which you have been influenced?
14. Do you spend time with your elders?
15. Do you read books?
Name some books you have read?
Who are the authors?
16. Who is the most influential person in your life?
17. What do you think about your character?
18. Who is it similar to?
19. How often do you take a shower?
20. How many times do you brush your teeth?
21. Do you know how to cook?
22. Can you clean the house by yourself?
23. What is your favorite meal and why?
24. What if your other side prefers and desires for different style of meal?
25. Do you prefer a woman as a great cook? Or an ok cook?
26. Do you prefer a woman who is younger than you or older than you?
27. Do you think you should consult you partner?
28. What are your future : Short term plans?: Long term plans?
29. What do you hope for in your life?
30. Do you like children? What do you prefer, a boy or a girl?
31. What happens if the doctor says, I cannot have children? How will you choose to approach to the situation?
32. My parents are old and might need my support? How do you want me to behave with them?
33. You must be knowing that in Islam, a woman has to obey the husband. Is this obedience open for everything or has certain conditions along with it?
34. I am planning to buy Islamic books about manner, duty, character and obligations of a Muslim women and wife and her role in Islam.
Did you buy or have any Islamic books about a man and his role and obligation in Islam and his duty as a husband and manner of a husband?
If the answer is NO!
> Why not?
> How can you be a Muslim husband if you do not know the duty, character and manner according to Islam?
If the answer is YES!
> What books you have read?
> Who are the authors?
> Is this the only one in the market and why you chose to read this particular book?
> Do you remember anything from what you have read?
> Can u share with me the duties and responsibilities of a husband towards a woman and character and duty of a man?
35. If we are planning to get married and supposed to be a muslim, do you want me to be a Muslim and want to be one, how? How can we be a real Muslim family?
36. If we are planning to get married...
How do you want to marry me?
What style of wedding do you prefer?
Where will it be?
What are you planning and expecting from me from finance, dowry and Maher point?
37. What is the role of your parents regarding your marriage?
38. What are you expecting from me towards your parents?
39. Are you ready to put it in writing whatever you have said at the time of marriage? You have the right to set major conditions in the time of marriage according to Shari'a and Sunnah of Prophet Mohammad SAW.
If you lie in the time of marriage and I find the condition or what you promised was a lie, the marriage is off
Setting condition at the time of marriage is an option and a right, both has to agree about. At the time of marriage, man and the woman have the right to set a certain request or to set certain promises and duty. Once it is done it becomes obligation to fulfill if both agree about it. If either party fail or neglect or is found to be a liar, the marriage can be off.
If a person talks, don't listen to what he is saying, watch what he is doing, and you will know what he is saying!!!
> This means you will know whether he is fake or truthful!!
When you ask questions, how do you know whether the person is cooking the answer or knows the answer?
> If he is honest he will answer immediately with complete confidence.
> If a person is a liar he will take sometime to answer, he will get angry or change the topic or he will make up something or even he can agree with you and give you an excellent manner.
> In Islam a man gives a woman, the woman doesn't pay a man
40. I have my money, I have a small business and my family left me a piece of property, it generates income what you believe about this income and in case you do not have good income, what so you believe I should do and why?
Do you want me to support you: if answer is yes, what you consider that as?
Is this your right or obligation or goodness of me and in this case my supporting to you should be voluntarily from my side or upon your insistence and why?
41. If our parents are poor and you have to support them and support me too, how will you balance between both and why?
42. What is justice and how will you define the justice towards women?
43. I have a big degree I can make a lot of income but prefer to be a Muslim mother at home. Do you prefer me to work or be at home? And Why?
44. If I want to buy Islamic books and I like to seek knowledge Islamic/non Islamic, what do you say and what you expect from me? Do you know about the rights of woman in Islam to seek knowledge and what do you think about that?
45. If there is any family issue how to solve it, what is your method? Who would you consult and why?
46. If you making good money do you believe I have any right on this money yes/no and why?
If you are real what is your answer and what are you planning to do?
If you are fake go to pharmacy buy a bottle, set of diapers and go to mommy. You are mommy boy, I do not need you, the ummah does not need you and mankind does not need you.
*This is only for men and women not male and female*
I want to hurt you, good hurt to wake you up, I care for you I want you to be somebody, someone. Do you want to be?
If you reach this point and you survive there is hope for you. If you cannot ask yourself why and study shari'a and sunnah of Muhammad PBUH you will know what I mean.
This was intended for a muslim women seeking husband, and these are the questions to help them to find one, a real one. The Man can switch it and use it too. He can then apply most of the Question towards a women.
By Da'ee Ahmed Moait