“… O my son, the wife of a man is his means of serenity, and there is no life worthwhile by contradicting her. So if you wish to marry a woman, then ask about her family, for it is the goodly roots that bear the sweetest fruits. And know that women are extremely different to one another just like the fingers on a hand are different to each other, so guard yourself against every foul-mouthed one who has the tendency to cause harm.
From amongst them (women) is she who is most impressed with herself and who belittles her husband. If he honours her, she sees it to be due to her virtue over him. She does not thank for the (abundant) good, nor is she content with the little she receives from him. Her tongue against him is like a polished sword; and this has lifted the covering of shyness from her face. She is not ashamed of her faults, nor is she shy of her neighbours. She’s like a growling dog (ouch!), quarrelsome, biting and voracious. So the face of her husband becomes wounded and his honour abused. She does not preserve him neither in Deen (religion) nor in Dunya (worldly matters), and she does not care for his companionship nor does she increase him in offspring. His ‘hijab’ (covering) has been torn down by her, his ‘sitr’ (veil) has been widely spread out (i.e. his secrets and private affairs revealed), and all his goodness has been buried (forgotten). He wakes up depressed and spends the evening rebuking/scolding. His drink is bitter, his food in anger, and his children astray. His house is in ruins, his clothes dirty, and his hair messy. If he laughs, it’s without spirit, and if he talks, it’s out of coercion. His days are like night and his nights are full of woe. She has bitten him like a ravenous snake and stung him like a scorpion.
And from amongst them is the lazy, tipsy, obscene woman who rages, threatens, devises and has a quagmire of poison with her. She goes with the wind and flies with every bird. If her husband says ‘No’ she says ‘Yes’ and if he says ‘Yes’ she says ‘No.’ She brings shame to him and belittles all that’s in his hands. She puts forward parables for him and puts him down/lowers him beneath other men. She takes him from one state to another until his house fills with hate, his children bored and his livelihood scarce without blessing. He becomes lowly to his own self, until his friends reject him and his neighbours feel sorry for him.
And from amongst them is the foolish unwise woman, who places things in the wrong place, slurs her speech and takes what does not belong to her. She’s content and relies on his love, is pleased with his earnings but she consumes like a grazing donkey. Her radiance is seen but her voice is not heard, her house is not swept, her food is stale and her cooking pots are marked with residue! Her dough is sour, her water not cool, her goods cultivated, her utensils out of reach, her servant is often beaten and her neighbours deprived.
Then from amongst them (i.e. the one to look for) is the compassionate, tender, loving woman, who is blessed, affectionate and trustworthy when absent. She is beloved by her neighbours and is praiseworthy both inwardly and outwardly. A generous wife, full of virtue & morals and is not one to raise her voice. Her house is clean, her servant well-fed and her children look good. Her goodness is long-lasting and her husband joyful. She is dearly loved, familiar and harmonious. Modesty, integrity, and goodness is often attributed to her…”