Please i really do not know what to do or if this is even the right place to post?!

[robincowles]

I converted to Islam 6 years ago, recently started wearing my headscarf again, praying and reading Quran, however I am so worried about my partner who is also Sunni Muslim (British Pakistani), he is following the wrong path at the moment and I am trying my best to get him back on the right path, he is severely depressed about so many things that I can't even mention and yesterday evening he tried killing himself by trying to smash 2 bottles over his head. Thankfully he wasn't injured, nor did the bottles smash. His parents and 1 older brother and sister do not accept me because I am white (they do not know I am Muslim nor do they know aanything about me /they have never met me). I am so scared for him and making dua but I do not know what I am supposed to do.
Should I tell his younger brother or eldest brother or his aunties or someone about last night's attempt or a previous attempt last year??

I am trying to get him to speak to an imam and/or a doctor as he previously went to counselling but it is falling on deaf ears, I am trying my hardest to support him and be there for him and show him the right path by doing right myself but it is so difficult holding this information and not knowing what to do right for him??

Should I tell someone to share the burden (I am worried about them not taking it seriously or them telling him that they know and causing problems with us adding to his stress, and the fact it is such a bad thing to try and take your own life, I thank Allah for the bottles not smashing and letting him die in such a sinful way, but am worried people would only reject him further if they know??)

Please someone advise me, I am so distressed and worried for him and I really don't know which way to turn and what to do is right.

Jazak Allah Kheir

[robincowles]

Pls pls pls should I tell someone/his family or not or what else can I do except that which I have already done/am doing???

[amr123]

Sister, the most important thing to do now, is to raise your hands and make Dua to Allah the Almighty for help.

Try to get an Imam to talk to him. If its not possible, Try contacting one of the male members of the family if necessary. This could be tricky though, Pray to Allah that everything is solved easily.

[Abu-Rayhan]

since he has tried to commit suicide or serious self harm, then he may try it again, so this is why it is time to get him all the help he can, so do talk to his family and let them know; naturally they should be alarmed and should try their best to help him; reason with him; do not be afraid if they somehow interpret this as happening because his relations with you and try to seperate him from you, for saving his life is the most important thing now; tell him about hadiths of how suicide leads to hell fire

try to get him some councelling with an Imam or professional councellor, and appeal to his love and effection for you, tell him how hurt you would be, and how vulnerable and devastated you would be if any harm should ever come to him..., remind him of his responsibility to look after you...

apart from that, i dont see what else you can do then beg Allah for Allah to heal him from his distress and protect both him and you

all the best



ps: if this is to do with his family not accepting you, then let his family know you are a Muslim, and a devout one at that; this may change their attitude towards you

[Acacia]

Call the suicide helpline and talk to them about it (anonymously). They'll be able to give you more information. Also, is it just me or was there more to this thread... where did the rest of the comments go? (The help-line suggestion was made before).

[edit: ah... found it: http://www.sunniforum.com/forum/show...o-post-even-!-! not sure why it is posted twice but these are essentially the same, perhaps best to merge them?]

[Abdul1234]

I converted to Islam 6 years ago, recently started wearing my headscarf again, praying and reading Quran, however I am so worried about my partner who is also Sunni Muslim (British Pakistani), he is following the wrong path at the moment and I am trying my best to get him back on the right path, he is severely depressed about so many things that I can't even mention and yesterday evening he tried killing himself by trying to smash 2 bottles over his head. Thankfully he wasn't injured, nor did the bottles smash. His parents and 1 older brother and sister do not accept me because I am white (they do not know I am Muslim nor do they know aanything about me /they have never met me). I am so scared for him and making dua but I do not know what I am supposed to do.
Should I tell his younger brother or eldest brother or his aunties or someone about last night's attempt or a previous attempt last year??

I am trying to get him to speak to an imam and/or a doctor as he previously went to counselling but it is falling on deaf ears, I am trying my hardest to support him and be there for him and show him the right path by doing right myself but it is so difficult holding this information and not knowing what to do right for him??

Should I tell someone to share the burden (I am worried about them not taking it seriously or them telling him that they know and causing problems with us adding to his stress, and the fact it is such a bad thing to try and take your own life, I thank Allah for the bottles not smashing and letting him die in such a sinful way, but am worried people would only reject him further if they know??)

Please someone advise me, I am so distressed and worried for him and I really don't know which way to turn and what to do is right.

Jazak Allah Kheir

Salaams

smashing bottles on his head sounds more like a cry for help or an attempt at self harm than a full blown suicide attempt.

I guess that your husband has either got harmful friends or is isolating himself from others

if your husband has got any good sensible religious friends encourage him to spend as much time with them as possible and ask them to support him, as we become like those we associate with

don't hold a grudge against his parents for their ignorance and bad manners towards you, let it go and pray for Allah to enlighten them in a good way.

persuade your husband to visit his GP and explain to him (the GP) that he is feeling depressed etc, if you are living in the UK (or similar) the GP can give him anti-depressants or/and anti-anxiety medication as required and get him support from local mental health services where you are.

If he has an alcohol problem (something that is more common than we may expect) try to get him to start attending an alcoholics anonymous group near you

whatever you do, if he is on a determined path of self destruction avoid letting yourself be dragged down by it and stay positive for both of your sakes

remember that Allah is always there and He can always hear your prayers, if He doesn't answer them all straight away they are at least added to your good deeds